Wardrobe Malfuction--Seafaring Edition

ME-ARG, Mateys! 

This be the day to MEOW LIKE A PIRATE!

Felix the Fearless here, searching this treasure chest for treats booty.

Shiver me timbers--there's Catio Chips in this chest.  Maybe the map will lead to more?

Yes, the map shows the way...time to set a course across the vast uncharted tile into the Land o'Plenty!

Um.

After I fix my eye patch.

Can't go marauding without my disguise...

Well, BLAST.

Maybe I can score some golden goodies from the serving wench, instead!

Happy Sailing Saturday!

XX  Fearless Felix  XX

Ticked Off Tortie

Kitties!

May ling here...

...and boy-o-boy am I mad!

Everything looks normal here, right?

Well...check out behind my left ear--do you see that tiny bit of white?

It's a FEATHER in my head fur!

Mommy was snuggling with me on the sofa when she felt something poking her in the back, it was an escapee from her old, el cheapo feather pillow.  First she let me sniff it (interesting!) and then it all went downhill, as you can plainly see.

Hell hath no fury like a Tortie scorned...

Later, I ate the feather.  Mommy had better be afraid...she might be next!

Happy Tuesday!

XX  Miffed May Ling  XX

In Which Mommy Gets Revenge

Kitties!

The Mommy here.

It has come to my attention that my highly refined Sense of Fashion has been seriously maligned by this feline:

The light of a thousand suns is less blinding than your horrifyingly misguided version of haute couture, Mommy.  I speak only the truth.

Well.  How embarrassing.

  I admit that perhaps--and only rarely--my outfits aren't always totally catwalk-ready...but c'mon, everybody knows that tie-dye is a neutral, and furthermore, polka dots go with everything; 'specially if the polka dots are heart shaped.  In my opinion (which, since I have the thumbs is the only one that counts) my ensembles generally teeter on the precipice of drab, which is why I like to throw on a bright neon-colored pair of Crocs to liven up my Look.

However, as an optimist I like to look on the bright side of any situation, Tiny J--cos now I have a great excuse to post these photos of you!

::diggity dig dig dig scratch dig excavate dig to China sniff scratch dig::

SSSSSSSSssssssssssssss...

::wiggle::

::inspect::

::bury cover scratch scratch scratch::

hee hee hee...revenge is sweet.

Happy Friday!

XX  The Devious Mommy  XX

Tiny Tuesday

Kitties!

Tiny Johnson here.

I'm getting some much-needed scritchies, cuddling with Mommy on the sofa while she reads her Kindle on her one day off last week.  This is normally KonaKitty's spot, but since it's daytime she's sleeping on the Catio in Apartment "B".  (Which is also her spot.)  I took advantage and shmoozed jumped up cos my scrufficles really really really needed attention.

You might think I've got it made, but as you know, Mommy's sartorial choices can be rather visually terrifying, and today's "outfit" is an excellent example of her inability to successfully mix and/or match something as simple as two pieces of clothing.

The heart-spotted jammy pants aren't too bad, but look at the shirt she picked out!  Yes, she CHOSE this shirt after she put on the bottoms.  It's truly miraculous we don't go blind.

aaaiiiieeeeeEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!

Only Mommy could wear black, white, and gray and still clash!

It's awful.  

Thank Cod she's good at ear massages.

And that she doesn't leave the house dressed like this!

Much.

Happy Tuesday!

XX  Jimmy John James  XX

Sunday with Sheebie

Friends and Kitties!

Technology is a wonderful thing.  Take windbreakers for example--when I was a kid the classic windbreaker jacket was a nylon shell with a thin fabric flocked liner, and it totally Did Not live up to the moniker; I think the wind considered these types of jackets a mere annoyance in it's mission to transform a small child walking home from school into a kidsicle.  Nowadays, it's a whole different story.  I recently purchased a new windbreaker that scoffs at anything below a gale.  This thing is phenomenal--I'm pretty sure it's made from magical fairy dust polymer. I got a Pearl Izumi Barrier Convertible Jacket.  The sleeves zip off so it's a  vest, too.  The fabric is incredibly lightweight, and warm.  Worth every penny, and I'm a cheapskate.

Fun on Wheels

Scott pimped my ride for me!

I never knew such a wondrous fabric existed, in fact, in the past couple of weeks I've had a crash course in all sorts of performance related fabrics due to the fact that I need to look stylish riding my new bike.  Oh, and I'd like to stay warm, too.  It gets cold here--really--this morning it was in the low 40's and there was lots of snow on the mountains.  (Where it belongs.)  The aforementioned wind can be sharp because of how it funnels through the valley and 20+ mph gusts are common, summer and winter.

I usually detest shopping for clothes but eBay and Amazon really came through for me this time.  Since my everyday clothes roster is all black and gray I decided to go for some wild bright shirts (so the emergency helicopter can spot me where I've wiped out, LOL) and my Windbreaker of Wonder (WoW) is a bright screaming yellow.  So, when I go out riding at this time of the year I am thusly attired: carbon-fiber helmet, liner cap with shade brim, gel gloves, ergonomic and gender appropriate chamois-padded shorts, windproof knickers (with articulated knees!), compression bra, jersey, shoes (thanks Mom and Dad!), and the WoW.  I'm comfortable, exercising, and trendy!  Life is good.  

So last Tuesday I took my new jacket for a spin on my longest ride to date, I rode about 50 minutes with a couple of breaks for water and scenery, and I'm here to tell you, the right equipment really made the ride enjoyable, even though there were a couple spots where I was convinced that death was imminent whilst pedaling uphill.  Not one molecule of wind assailed my hide until I got warm, unzipped, and invited the air in.   It was fabulous.  We had a front roll through Thursday with a record 0.77 inches of rain and much cooler temperatures, so my next ride will be interesting to see how warm I stay wearing my present kit.  The paving dudes have been working all week on the bike trail connectors that go by our house, and I'm dying to get out and explore.  I'm writing this on Saturday afternoon and if the the sun is still shining when I get home I'm gonna gear up and go do some science.

*Later*

The results are in; the WoW performed fantastically in colder weather!   I was so comfortable I ended up going a lot farther than I intended.  Scott took a couple of extremely flattering husbandly photos of me in full regalia.

Front

Side

And off I go!

Happy Sunday, and have a great week!

XX  Sheebie  XX

Sunday with Sheebie-Food & Fashion Edition

Friends & Kitties!

Sheebie here.

First, the Food.
Here's my Mom's Pumpkin Pie recipe:

1 9-inch unbaked pie crust
1 15-oz can pumpkin
3/4 C sugar
1/2 tsp salt
1 1/4 tsp cinnamon
1/4 tsp ginger
1/8 tsp nutmeg
1 1/4 C soy milk
2 eggs

Blend ingredients, pour into pie crust.  Bake at 425 for 15 minutes, then at 350 for 40-50 minutes, or until knife comes out clean from the filling.
Delicious!
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Now, the Fashion.

You know, sometimes you can't believe everything you read on the internet, especially if it's written by Cats. For instance, the Despots my Cats would have you believe that I am a total moron, fashion-wise. Amazingly, this would be true.  I am forever grateful for my t-shirt and jeans work uniform.  The thought of having to put together a "outfit" every morning fills me with dread.  I've never been very happy with my looks; I've done the starving and make-up and fake nails and cruel shoes, etc. in my quest to be satisfied with myself.  In the end, I decided it wasn't worth the anxiety and I wear what's comfortable, in mostly black.  My outrageous lounge wear is closer to my true sense of personal expression; wild and disorganized--but it's not what I wear out of the house in public.  Much.

However, I do enjoy looking at fashion, and the more "out there", the better, which is why I love RuPaul's Drag Race.  What can possibly be more fun than watching fun fashion on drag queens?

Nothing!

Except that it does.  For the summer TV season, RuPaul hosts a show called Drag U, and the tag-line of the program is "Putting drag queen heads on real women's bodies"!  I'm telling you, this show is a hoot-n-a-half, if you don't get the LOGO channel you can watch it on line. The format is as follows:  three women appear on the show, sick of their general fashion malaise and in a personal rut. Each of them are assigned a drag queen to give them a makeover ("the miracle of drag") using the look given to them by the Dragulator.  (you can do the Dragulator on line, too!)  They learn a dance number to lip sync to, and perform it later in front of a live audience and a panel of judges.  It's a competition, the winner "Dragulates with Honor" and gets a nice cash prize.

Strangely enough, I've learned a few things watching the show.  Really!  Who's going to work harder to look like a woman, a man dressing as a woman or the real article?  The drag queen, of course.  Sure, a lot of it is camp, but there's some good advice in there.  Take proportion.  I have a long-shaped face, with long hair and no bangs.  Guess who was making her face look even longer?  Guess who went and had her hair cut, and got some new glasses to add some breadth that long face?

That would be me!

 I have not mastered the self timer on the camera.

aaiiiieeeeeee!

Scary.

Nice towel in the background...

et voila!

Thank you, Ru, I really like my new hair-do and snazzy specs.  Now, if you can show me how to grow about four inches taller that would be great...

And what's with the weird color changes in the background when I insert a photo over something I've typed?  Danged Blogger.


Happy Sunday!
Have a great week, everyone.

XX  Sheebie  XX

Torture Tuesday.

Kitties!

Salem here.

Daddy went to CVS Pharmacy the other afternoon.  

This is dangerous. 

 CVS carries pet "supplies".

What the...????  

ACK!

no*no*no*no*no*no*no*no*nooooooooo...

Mommy, you are a lousy no-good n'er-do-well traitor, and so is Daddy.  Quit laughing.

Oh great, a witness.  My boneless humiliation is complete.

The peeps were so horribly bent on binding me into this terrible contraption they whipped the tags off but left the plastic doo-dads!  They forgot to sweep the floor, too...heh heh.

So, be honest, does this outfit make me look wide?

What do you mean, Mommy, "wider"?  You are an awful person.

Now, take it off!

I have revenge to plan.

Happy Tuesday!

XX  Salem  XX